All right folks, here we are. The end is nigh, and oh what an end it is!

In the weeks following the car accident, Pierre is in a bad state (understandably) and he spends most of his time locked up in Jean’s room. Daphne has turned her bitch up to eleven, criticizing Ruby at every opportunity and Gisselle is using her knowledge of the voodoo curse to get Ruby to do her bidding and spill the details of her relationship with Beau. See Ruby? This is why we keep secrets. Speaking of Mr. Andreas,

And we were

(I replaced Eric, I had to go the Blaine route) Beau is forbidden to speak to Ruby, and Gisselle is extremely delighted about this. One day after a fight with Gisselle, Ruby is crying in her room when she is visited by Daphne. Turns out that the coming Saturday is Uncle Jean’s birthday, and as Pierre is in no state to go and visit him, Daphne wants Ruby to come with her, as it’s the least she can do, being such a terrible stepdaughter and all. Ruby is naturally very excited, as she’s wanted to visit him for some time. Daphne warns her not to tell Pierre, as it’ll just make him feel guilty. Ruby promises not to mention it, though she does tell her sister. Gisselle is surprised, but figures that if anyone could remember little things like their uncle’s birthday, it would be Daphne. Gisselle is glad that Daphne didn’t ask her to go, as she hates the institution and thinks it’s all pointless since Jean is so out of it.

On Saturday, Ruby gets extra dressed up and bounds down to breakfast, where she is disappointed to see that Pierre isn’t at the table. Daphne explains that Pierre has remembered that it’s Jean’s birthday and it’s put him into one of his states. Daphne and Ruby head to the institution, which is about twenty miles outside of the city. Along the way, Ruby tries to ask Daphne about Jean’s condition, but Daphne just tells her to ask the doctors, something that Ruby finds odd. The hospital is very pretty from the road, but as they get closer, Ruby can see the bars on the windows and feels a sense of foreboding.

Once they get inside, Daphne introduces herself and Ruby to the doctors and Ruby gets the feeling that everyone is staring at her. They go in to see Dr. Cheryl, the head of the hospital, who asks Ruby lots of questions and tells her that he hopes she’ll be comfortable there, and asks to take her on a tour, while Daphne stays in his office. Ruby thinks that this is all a little peculiar, but she agrees to go on the tour. On the tour, Dr. Cheryl keeps showing things like the art room to Ruby and waiting to hear her opinions of them. Ruby keeps asking about Jean, but is put off each time.  Finally, the tour ends with Dr. Cheryl introducing her to a nurse, and Ruby finally realizes that Daphne has just had her committed. Snap! Officially, Dr. Cheryl says, Ruby is just in for an evaluation, but she’s not allowed to leave or call anyone—since she’s a minor, Daphne is legally allowed to do this, and Ruby needs to cooperate.

And what is Daphne’s reasoning behind this (at least the one she’s telling the doctors), you might ask? See, according to Daphne, Ruby has trouble controlling her impulses around the opposite sex, a nymphomaniac is the scientific term, Dr. Cheryl helpfully tells us.

This was Daphne's first idea, but she couldn't find any chains.

Rather than pointing out that having sex one time with one’s boyfriend does not a nymphomaniac make, Ruby chooses to instead tell the doctor that Daphne isn’t her real mother, and that this is all a plot against her. Yes, that will help your situation, Ruby. She’s left in her room until her first appointment with Dr. Cheryl. She thinks grimly that maybe Nina should have gotten one of Daphne’s hair ribbons to put in the snake box instead of Gisselle’s. At the appointment, Dr. Cheryl makes her look at ink blots and shows her a form that Pierre ostensibly signed giving his permission to keep Ruby at the hospital. Ruby insists that it must be forged, but, not surprisingly, Dr. Cheryl doesn’t believe her and just sends her down to the art room for craft time.

In the art room, Ruby meets a young man named Lyle who strikes up a conversation with her about what her “problems” are. Ruby tells him that she’s apparently a nymphomaniac, and that she’s being held there against her will. Lyle takes it all in stride, and explains that he’s been in the institution since he was a child, and that his problem is “immobility”—he can’t make even simple decisions. When it’s craft time, he just sits and waits for it to be over, he can’t choose anything to do, when it’s lunchtime, he eats whatever he’s handed. He recognizes Ruby’s last name, as he knows Jean, and he promises to introduce Ruby at lunch. He also mentions that he can help Ruby to break out of the hospital. He’s always known a way, he just can’t ever decide to use it. The bell rings for lunch, and the patients head down.

At lunch, Lyle and Ruby sit with Jean, and Ruby decides that the best plan of action when dealing with a mentally damaged man who can’t handle change is to immediately tell him her entire life story, up to and including the fact that Daphne hates her and just had her committed. Shockingly, Jean doesn’t react well. He seemed to be okay at first, and even liked part of the story, but as soon as Ruby gets to the end and mentions her father, Jean freaks out, and has to be taken forcibly back to his room by the orderlies, all the while yelling the word “jib”.

Not pictured: flighty redheads with no common sense.

Lyle tries to tell Ruby that Jean’s outburst wasn’t her fault, but let’s all just accept that it was and move on. After lunch, Ruby and Lyle go outside and Lyle explains how to get out of the hospital–an window in the laundry room that’s never locked. Ruby tries to get Lyle to come with her, but he can’t bring himself to do it, so he gives her some money and directions, boosts her out the window, and Ruby flees. We will never hear about Lyle ever again.

Ruby gets a bus back to New Orleans, and when she gets home Daphne is waiting for her, having been called by Dr. Cheryl. Ruby accuses Daphne of being jealous of her, of the love that Pierre has for her, and had for her mother, and Daphne tries to play it off. Ruby tells Daphne that she’s going to tell Pierre everything and Daphne laughs, as Pierre is still upstairs in Jean’s room crying. Daphne’s been running the business and all of the other aspects of their lives for a long time, so she’s really not too threatened by Ruby’s words. Ruby runs upstairs where, sure enough, Pierre is still sitting alone in his brother’s room. Ruby tells Pierre what happened, and that she saw Jean, and she tells him about Jean repeating the word “jib”. This clearly affects Pierre, and he finally breaks down and confesses to Ruby: on the day of Jean’s accident, Pierre sent the jib flying, hitting his brother in the head. He didn’t mean for Jean to get as hurt as he did, he only wanted to take him down a few notches, but it wasn’t an accident and it’s been eating him up inside every since. This family has some issues with sibling rivalry, god damn.

Ruby comforts her father, but tells him that he’s got to stop wallowing in his guilt and letting Daphne run everything, since she’s awful and all. She says that the lies have got to stop, and she’s going right then to tell Gisselle the truth about their mother, but that Pierre got to back her up. Pierre agrees, and goes down to speak with Daphne. Ruby goes into Gisselle’s room, where her twin is mightily annoyed that Ruby hasn’t come to do her bidding for hours. Ruby tells her about the institution, which naturally Gisselle doesn’t believe, but Ruby assures her that it’s all true, and then tells her about Gabrielle and the baby selling, and everything. Gisselle is dubious, to say the least, and screams for Pierre. Ruby goes down to get him, and finds him with Daphne, who freaks out when she hears that Ruby’s told Gisselle the truth. Pierre tells his wife that he wanted Ruby to tell her sister the truth, that the lies are out of hand, and it’s time that they all started out fresh. He goes upstairs to Gisselle, leaving Ruby and Daphne staring at each other. Daphne tells Ruby that she hasn’t destroyed her, and Ruby protests that was never her intention. She just wants a family, and maybe, someday, she’ll be able to call Daphne “Mother” and mean it. She leaves Daphne alone with her thoughts.

In the epilogue, Ruby waxes poetic about the BAYOU. Gisselle refuses to hear anything about their CAJUN background at first, though she eventually starts asking more questions. She still makes Ruby swear never to tell a soul.  One afternoon when Ruby and Gisselle are in the latter’s room talking, Edgar comes to the door to tell Ruby that she has a visitor—a Mr. Paul Tate. Ruby explains who he is to Gisselle, who immediately demands that Ruby bring him up to see her. Ruby goes down to get Paul, who explains that after he got Ruby’s letter (on which she had deliberately not put a return address), he took a bottle of bourbon over to Grandpere Jack’s and got Pierre’s name out of him. Ruby and Paul share a giggle about how he abused an old man’s addiction, and Paul asks if things have gotten better for Ruby since her last letter. He’s disappointed to hear that they have, as he’d hoped he could convince Ruby to come back with him to the BAYOU. Ruby points out that her family is in New Orleans too, and this gives Paul the opening he was looking for to ask where Gisselle is. Ruby tells him about the car accident, and they go upstairs to see her. On the way up, Paul tells Ruby that Jack has gotten worse since she’s been gone, having torn up the shack and surrounding land still looking for Grandmere Catherine’s non-existent money, and that for a time Catherine’s old friends had suspected him of killing Ruby, since she disappeared so suddenly. Ruby realizes that she might want to write some more letters and assure people that she’s alive.

So Paul and Gisselle finally meet and since “Nothing brought the tint back into Gisselle’s cheeks and the glint back into her eyes as much as a handsome young man”, Gisselle flirts inappropriately with Paul, to Ruby’s bemusement and Paul’s amusement (and secret glee). Gisselle even suggests that she and Ruby should visit Paul in the SWAMPS someday. Paul likes that idea, and tells them about his boats and his horses, and when Gisselle isn’t sure that she could sit on a horse, Paul says that he’d sit with her, and now I’m moving on because these two are just too much for me. Paul leaves, declining an invitation to dinner. Ruby goes out to sit on the patio after he leaves, where she is joined by Pierre. She tells him about Paul’s visit, and is surprised to learn that he knows all about Paul. Pierre explains that Gabrielle didn’t keep secrets like that. Pierre tells Ruby that he wants her and Gisselle to attend a private boarding school in Baton Rouge the next year, as it will help to cool the family situation. Ruby isn’t too happy about the idea of leaving Beau, who she is finally finding time to see again, but she agrees for her father’s sake. Pierre thanks her, and goes inside to tell Gisselle. Ruby sits alone and thinks about the BAYOU and about Paul, and thinks about the future.

And thus endeth Ruby, dear readers! Up next is the dramatically titled Pearl in the Mist, with more boarding school drama, allusions to lesbianism, racial tensions, teenage pregnancy, guys named Buck, and creepy blind piano players than you can shake any number of sticks at! Could you be any more excited?! Look for the Cover Post in the next couple of days, and until then, remember that Swamp Thing and I love you.

When Ruby goes to school the next day, she learns that Gisselle was right–everyone is treating Ruby like she has the plague, and even Mookie won’t talk to her. Beau meets up with Ruby later in the day, and explains that he’s now on probation, if he messes up at all, he’s off of the baseball team, and his parents want him to stay away from Ruby. He declares that he’s not going to listen to them, but Ruby doesn’t want to cause any more trouble and tells him that it’s better if they really do cool off for a bit. At lunch, no one will sit with Ruby and people actually get up and leave their tables if she sits down. Mookie finally talks to her, but only to tell Ruby that everyone at school thinks that she stripped on purpose, and she wants to know if it’s true that Ruby is BFFs with a real live prostitute. Damn, Mookie. Ruby denies it all, and Mookie’s apologetic, but her mom won’t let her be friends with Ruby anymore either. Ruby even drops out of the school play, since she doesn’t want her notoriety to be the only draw.

That night, Pierre doesn’t come down to dinner as he’s having one of his episodes, and Daphne brushes aside Ruby’s concerns that they should get him some medicine by telling her stepdaughters that only good news and happy things will help Pierre. Yup, that cures chronic depression. Later on that evening, Gisselle comes to Ruby’s room and gleefully tells her that Deborah is having a party that weekend and that Beau is going with Martin and Gisselle. Gisselle says that she knows that Beau now regrets dumping her for Ruby, but she’s going to torture him a little by dirty dancing with Martin in front of him and other classy maneuvers. Ruby snaps at her a little and Gisselle leaves, laughing. Ruby starts remembering her old life in the BAYOU and decides to write a letter to Paul. She fills him in about Buster Trahaw and Grandpere Jack, about how she found out who her real father was and came to New Orleans to meet him, and lastly, that she has an identical twin sister. This is the best letter Paul has ever received.

Days go by, and while school doesn’t get much easier, Ruby can tell that her scandal is fast becoming old news, and that while no one is being friendlier towards her, the outright shunning is dying down. She and Beau gaze at each other sadly a bunch of times, but she doesn’t give him an opening to talk to her. One afternoon as she’s leaving school, Gisselle and Martin pull up in Martin’s car, which is already reeking of pot. Gisselle invites Ruby to come along with them to Martin’s house. Ruby refuses and Gisselle warns her that if she says no to invitations, then Gisselle will stop giving them. Ruby rolls her eyes and her sister and Martin peel off. Ruby heads home and goes to do her homework, but she’s interrupted about an hour later by shouting from downstairs. It’s the police, there to talk to Daphne. Gisselle and Martin have been in a car accident (Martin ran straight into the back of a bus), and they are both badly hurt. Ruby and Daphne hurry to the hospital, where they meet Pierre and learn that Gisselle is in surgery, and that Martin is dead.

RIP, Martin. You ran your car into a bus, because you got high.

Gisselle comes out of surgery and their parents go to see her.  Her spine has been injured and she can’t walk. Daphne is a touch more concerned with the idea of wheelchairs and nurses than she really should be, but Pierre is completely devastated, and blames himself, calling it his punishment for something that he won’t tell Ruby. The three of them go home, where Pierre immediately splits for Jean’s room, Daphne locks herself in her suite, and Ruby calls Beau. His parents are going to be heading to the Dumas house that night, so Beau offers to come along to see Ruby, but she tells him not to come, as she has to go somewhere. Beau is a little “What, you have a date?”, but Ruby assures him that’s not the case. Instead, she goes with Nina back to see Mama Dede. Nina insists that the accident wasn’t Ruby’s fault, that Gisselle’s heart was already twisted and she invited the bad gris-gris in it herself, but Ruby isn’t hearing it and off they go. Mama Dede tells Ruby that it doesn’t matter what she wanted to happen, she “threw her anger into the wind” and it did what it did. You can’t pull it back. Ruby wants to try to do something, though, so Mama tells her that she has to reach inside the box with the snake and take Gisselle’s hair ribbon back. Despite knowing full well that the snake is a python and not likely to bite her, Ruby is not exactly up on the idea of putting her hand in that box.

No fear Ruby, fear is the mind-killer.

Ruby does it, and Mama tells her to keep the hair ribbon close, since it’s been to the other world and back. She also tells Ruby that she has to straighten out her own nonsense before she can help Gisselle with hers. Ruby and Nina go home. At dinner, Daphne has gotten ready to greet the various friends of the family who are going to be coming by, and she bitches at Pierre not to fall apart. Ruby snaps that maybe they should be more concerned about Gisselle’s well-being than they are embarrassing the family, and Daphne blames Ruby for what’s happened, saying that Gisselle never acted this way before Ruby came to town.

Daphne is being so meeeean!

Suck it up, Ruby.

The next day at school, everyone is all over Ruby, with sympathy and crying and wanting details. Ruby and Beau go to visit Gisselle after school. Pierre and Daphne are keeping Martin’s death from Gisselle, and while Ruby keeps that secret, she lets it slip that she didn’t want “this much” to happen when Gisselle makes a comment about Ruby being happy about the accident. Gisselle isn’t stupid, so she guesses that Ruby wanted something to happen, and Ruby confesses about the voodoo. Smart move. Gisselle decides that she won’t tell Pierre about it as long as Ruby “makes it up to her”, so Ruby prepares to leave, knowing that she’ll effectively be her sister’s slave for a while. As she’s leaving Gisselle calls out to her, asking if she knows the only way that she and Ruby can ever be twins again. Ruby does not. “Get crippled”, is Gisselle’s reply.

A couple of days later, Gisselle is told about Martin and she loses it, though she kicks Ruby out when she tries to comfort her. She’s also allowed to come home, where Pierre and Daphne have hired a nurse named Mrs. Warren for her. She wants Gisselle to start doing things for herself, but Ruby’s guilt and Gisselle’s blackmail keep that from happening. Beau and some of his baseball teammates come over after school one day and Gisselle is as flirty as ever, making them fight over who brings her a drink and who gets to bring her a pillow. After a bit, Ruby and Beau go off to have some alone time, but they are interrupted by a furious Daphne, who kicks Beau out of the house. When Ruby asks what’s wrong, Daphne makes Ruby follow her down to the studio. Daphne says that she was always suspicious about why Beau left Gisselle for Ruby so quickly, and she blames Ruby’s for Gisselle’s accident, claiming that if Beau and Gisselle had still been together, she would never have been in that car with Martin. So she thought about it, and then she realized what it must be. As she says this, she flips the pages on Ruby’s easel until she reveals the nude drawing that Ruby did of Beau. Smooth, Ruby, smooth. Just leave it up on the easel. Daphne says that it’s too good for Ruby to have done it from imagination, and Ruby admits that Beau posed for her. Daphne locks the studio and bans Ruby from using it and sends her to her room.

We’re down to the wire here, folks! I would have tried to wrap it up in this recap, but there’s some truly wacky stuff coming up and I had to have room to unveil it in. Plus, I needed room to make a gom jabbar reference.

Look what I got from Shannon of the fantabulous Shannon’s Sweet Valley High Blog and Luke’s Diner AND from Lindsay of the wonderful The Literary Adventures of Lindsay Monroe AND from Cordee at the hilarious Gourmet Scum and Other Fun Stuff! Thank you thank you!

Here are the rules that came with the award:

1) Thank the person who nominated me for this award.

2) Copy the award & place it on my blog.

3) Link to the person who nominated me for this award.

4) Tell us 7 interesting things about yourself.

5) Nominate 7 bloggers.

6) Post links to the 7 blogs I nominate.

Interesting things about me:

1. My dream used to be to become a music video director. Yes really. I would storyboard ideas and everything. I still do it in the car or on the Metro when I’m bored.
2. Since I am contractually obligated to mention it at every possible opportunity: I play roller derby. It’s the best sport in the world, and it lets me wear sparkly miniskirts and slam myself into other people whilst on wheels. I adore it.
3. I have a fantastic cat named Theresa, who is named after a character from the oft-mourned soap opera Passions.
4. I once saw Cokie Roberts in a ladies room. It was funny, (to me)  because I had to pretend to be disinterested and cool, and nod politely, when I really wanted to be all “OMG! I loved Founding Mothers!”. This was before she said that silliness about Hawaii, or I might have had to mention it.
5. I collect sock monkeys and sock monkey-related items. I even have earrings! (Thanks, SIL!)
6. I only wear blue mascara. I have since high school.
7. I am pretty obsessed with cryptozoology.

Seven awesome blogs:

1. Bookslide III – Run by the awesome Alana, who is recapping L.J. Smith for the edification of all, and whose thoughts on other books and reading in general are consistently thought-provoking, even when I don’t entirely agree. XD
2. Shannon’s Sweet Valley High Blog – Sweet Valley High was my WORLD when I was a pre-teen, and re-experiencing that with Shannon at the helm has been hysterical and amazing.
3. The Literary Adventures of Lindsay Monroe – She’s hilarious and I have to admit that that banner makes me laugh out loud every time. Oh Al.
4. Gourmet Scum and Other Fun Stuff – Old School Degrassi, BSC, 90210, Pike, SVH…um Cordee does it all and still stays sane and hilarious.
5. Like Pike – True, it’s been a while since she updated, but I can hardly fault anyone for that! Her Pike recaps are awesome.
6. Unleashing My Inner Teenager. – YA Lit was so much better in our youth. I love Whitney’s take on it.
7. Dibbly Fresh – Sadako is awesome and she just recapped CATS. I mean, come on!.

Please check out all of the links over there on the side, though, since they’re all great and I wish I could have nommed them all.

So, as you all know, I moved at the end of October. At some point in unpacking, I realized that I could not for the life of me locate my copy of Ruby. I looked. And I looked. I unpacked more boxes and I looked. I looked in both cars, in my skate bag, in my luggage from Thanksgiving, I looked everywhere I could imagine until I finally had to admit defeat and acknowledge that I should just buy a new copy (I keep them too long to justify just getting one from the library, plus most libraries, I’ve found, have about 10 copies of Flowers in the Attic, a sprinkling of the most recent books, and very little in-between). However, when I went around to the Barnes n Noble, they didn’t have it. Fine, I thought, Amazon it is. So I went and bought the whole Landry series, used but good, so that I was ready and armored up against this sort of thing ever happening again. The new (to me) books should be here any day now.
So guess what was under the passenger seat of my car this morning? Yeah.

And on that note, here we go.

Ruby goes home after fleeing the sleepover, where Gisselle and her friends tricked her into getting her picture taken mid-change. (Out of her clothes, she’s not a werewolf or anything. Sadly.) Edgar lets her in, and Ruby does her best to cover up how upset she is, especially when she sees that Edgar is also upset. She asks after her father and Daphne and is told that her stepmother has gone to bed, but her father has “retired for the evening”. She notes the difference in phrasing, but says goodnight to Edgar and heads upstairs. Once in the upper hall, Ruby hears the crying from her Hot-Uncle-in-a-Coma’s room and, feeling sad for her father, goes into the room to try and talk to him. The crying stops as soon as she knocks on the door, but she goes in anyway and calls for her father. She doesn’t see him, though there are lots of candles lit around the room, but she does take a moment to look at the many photos of Uncle Jean and note that he was, in fact, really really ridiculously good-looking. Oh you Dumas girls, I give up. She never does find Pierre, but is interrupted by Daphne, who pulls her out of the room and demands to know why she’s home. Ruby lies and says that she’s sick, and denies that there are any shenanigans going on over at the slumber party. Ruby also takes another moment to notice how pretty Daphne is and to think about how much she’d like to paint her.

………..

Daphne points out that none of Pierre’s tears and prayers and candles are going to change anything about Jean’s situation, and tells Ruby that he has doctors and priests to talk to if he needs comforting, so Ruby needs to go to bed. And after all, if Ruby’s so sick that she needed to come home, then she needs to go to sleep then, doesn’t she? Ruby gives in and goes to bed. The next morning, she’s woken up by a chipper Pierre, who tells her to have a light breakfast and take it easy that morning, even though she tells him that she feels better. Ruby can’t get over how he could have been sobbing the night before, but so peppy now.

Sounds like some form of melancholia to me.

Oh, I’m sorry, Swamp Thing, I must have forgotten to ask for your learned opinion. And “melancholia”? What, he’s got too much black bile? Off with you.

ANYWAY. Pierre tells Ruby that Gisselle called and is spending the day with her friends, and if Ruby feels better later on he’ll take her back over there, but Ruby demurs and says she just wants to relax like he suggested. They have breakfast, and Pierre waxes inappropriately about Gabrielle for a little bit before catching himself and heading to work. As Ruby is reading later on the porch, she’s interrupted by Beau. He’s just come from Claudine’s, and has heard all about the prank. He admits that they’re all still laughing at Ruby, but he tells her that they’re all sharks and terrible people, and he’s come by not to talk about them, but to ask Ruby out on a formal dinner date. He’s made reservations at Arnaud’s, and though Ruby doesn’t really know what that is, she can tell from his tone that it’s meant to be special. She accepts and Beau leaves. Ruby tells her parents about the date and Daphne is understandably confused, given that to her knowledge Beau was dating Gisselle. Pierre is all “Oh come on, honey, they’re young! And it’s not like they were engaged or anything! Ruby’s fitting in! Yay!” Daphne picks out a dress and jewelry for Ruby to wear, and makes her a hair appointment. While she’s picking out the dress, however, Daphne wants to know why Beau is suddenly so interested in Ruby, namely, is it because of her wanton CAJUN ways? Ruby is offended and snaps back that she’s found that well-bred CREOLE girls seem to be more promiscuous, but Daphne isn’t hearing that. She warns Ruby not to shame the family.

Beau arrives all slicked up, and needs Daphne’s help with pinning Ruby’s corsage, since her beauty has made him all trembly. Daphne makes sure to point out that he never has trouble pinning Gisselle. Nice, Daphne. Ruby and Beau go to dinner and have a lovely time, even though Ruby is paranoid, due to all of the warnings and advice Daphne gave her earlier. After dinner, Beau suggests that they go for a ride. Uh oh. They park out by a field somewhere and Beau tells Ruby about his dreams of becoming a doctor, and Ruby tells him a little about growing up in the BAYOU. Beau is confused by how poignantly she describes the SWAMPS and the people, especially Grandmere Catherine, since, after all, she was kidnapped and sold to her, but Ruby plays it off by explaining that GC wasn’t in on the plan, and didn’t find out till much later. Beau accepts this and moves on, namely into “Ruby you look so much like your sister but you’re so much more beautiful and magical lemme help you out of that dress” mode. They make out a little and Beau keeps comparing Ruby to Gisselle, until finally he mentions that he has a blanket in the trunk, and they could go out and lay under the stars. Ruby is not having that, and Beau is annoyed, since, after all, she’s a CAJUN girl, so she’s done this before, right? Ruby snaps that she has not, and Beau then changes tactics to “Then let me be the first, Ruby!” Ruby admits that she likes Beau, but she doesn’t want to do anything that she’ll regret. Beau finally backs off, and laughs that the first time he took Gisselle out to the field, she was all over him, haha, aren’t the twins so different? He drives her home and as he drops her off, they make plans for him to come by the next day so that they can practice their lines for the school play. They kiss good night (Standards Ruby, good lord!) and Ruby goes inside.

She’s met at the door by Edgar, who tells her that her family is waiting for her in the study. She goes in to find Daphne glaring at her, Pierre looking mournful, and Gisselle flashing the evil eye. Turns out that Gisselle told their parents about Annie, the girl from the bus, and naturally painted it in the best possible “Ruby knows a hooker and gave her our address, also she took us to Storyville!” light. Daphne chews her out and shuts down her every attempt to explain, then sends the girls to bed. As they head upstairs Gisselle snots that she hopes Beau and Ruby had a good time on their date. Ruby wonders what possible parts of Gabrielle and Pierre combined to create Gisselle. Um, the best parts?

Obviously.

The next day, Ruby is left alone at the house as Gisselle goes off with Martin and some friends, Pierre goes to the office, and Daphne goes to lunch. Beau comes over like they’d talked about and he and Ruby go up to her studio to practice. Beau is impressed by Ruby’s artwork, and tells her that she should do a drawing of him. As in, all of him. Draw ‘im like your French girls, Ruby. Ruby is embarrassed, though intrigued, but argues that she doesn’t need Daphne to think any less of her than she already does. Ruby tells Beau about Gisselle ratting her out about Annie, and Beau tells her that her sister is just jealous, and it’s too darn bad, because he likes Ruby and nothing’s going to stop that. They make out some, then try to practice their lines, but neither of them can concentrate. Beau locks the door and gets all intense and “Paint me, Ruby”, then he takes all of his clothes off. Subtle, Beau. Ruby tries to get him to knock it off, but eventually she gives in and draws him. Then they have sex. It’s all very “Wait!” and “Oh okay” and there are waves and explosions, and then they’re getting dressed after and Ruby is upset because she’d thought she was different than her Landry ancestors, but she isn’t. She can’t explain that to Beau, however, so things get a little awkward until he assures her that he loves her. Oh, okay. Shut up, Beau. Then, there is a pounding at the door and Daphne is out in the hall yelling at them to unlock the door. Buzz. Kill.

They rearrange themselves as fast as they can and unlock the door. Daphne is highly suspicious, but as Beau produces the scripts and Ruby’s hidden the drawing, she’s got nothing to work with. She kicks them out of the studio and warns them against locking doors in her house. Beau leaves. The next morning when he picks her up for school, he’s relieved that Daphne didn’t try to get any more information out of Ruby after he left, but, as his parents are having dinner at the Dumas’ house the next week, he thinks he and Ruby will just have to cool it down for a little while. Unfortunately, that’s not meant to be, for almost as soon as Ruby walks into the school, she feels like everyone is giggling and smirking at her. Later, she bumps into a guy in the hallway who flashes a copy of her naked picture at her. Gisselle and her friends show up, and Gisselle laughs and advises everyone to make sure that people know that it’s Ruby and not her in the picture. Ruby freaks out and screams at them, calling them animals, then, once again, she runs out of the school toward home. She has got to learn not to react that way all of the time.

Ruby goes home and is met once again by Edgar, but this time she doesn’t try to hide how upset she is, and Edgar, visibly angry, takes her back to see Nina. Ruby tells Nina that every time she tries to be happy, Gisselle just ruins it, and Nina decides that the only thing to do is to go and have the Voodoo Queen of New Orleans put a spell on Gisselle.

What.

Ruby is pretty much on my side of this idea, but Nina convinces her that this will take the bad out of Gisselle’s heart and teach her to be good. Ruby can’t deny that that’s a pretty good idea, so she agrees and they head into a poorer neighbor than Ruby was expecting, since she thought that the Queen (Mama Dede) would live in like, a voodoo palace or something. Mama Dede is a beautiful young blind woman, and she listens to Nina’s description of Gisselle and her crimes and agrees to help. She takes Ruby’s hand and knows that she and Gisselle don’t really know each other, and they burn some candles and there’s a snake in a box and Nina coaxes Ruby to tell Mama Dede Gisselle’s name and there’s chanting and then Nina gives Mama one of Gisselle’s hair ribbons and into the snake box it goes. Yowsa.

Ruby and Nina go home, but when Gisselle returns from school that day, she doesn’t seem different at all. She tells Ruby that after she left, Beau got into a fight with Billy and they both got sent to Dr. Storm’s office. The Andreas parents will have to go see the principal before Beau can go back to school, and Gisselle also got sent up to the office and Dr. Storm will be calling Pierre and Daphne. Gisselle tells her sister that it was all just a joke, but now everyone thinks Ruby is crazy for freaking out the way she did. Ruby tells Gisselle that she’s sorry Beau got in trouble for protecting her, but that everyone at school is awful and even though Ruby comes from the SWAMPS, people there aren’t as needlessly nasty and cruel as they are in New Orleans. She really thought that she and Gisselle could be real sisters, but instead Gisselle just abuses her at every turn. Gisselle notes that Ruby’s making her out to be the bad guy when she (Ruby) is the one who just showed up out of nowhere and stole Pierre’s love, stole everyone’s affection, and stole Beau. Gisselle warns Ruby not to get her in trouble when Dr. Storm calls and leaves.

That night, the principal does call and talks to Daphne. Apparently after the fight between Beau and Billy, a teacher took the picture and showed it to Dr. Storm, who in turn tells Daphne about it. She calls the twins into the study and demands to know which one of them let that picture be taken. Ruby admits that she’s the one in the picture, but she lies for Gisselle and says that the boys snuck into Claudine’s without any of the girls knowing and took the picture. Oh Ruby. Daphne doesn’t know how her newly found swamp daughter keeps getting herself into these situations, but she’s had it. Ruby is grounded. Dinner that night is sad and subdued, with Daphne furious, Pierre morose and disappointed, and Gisselle gloating. When Ruby goes to bed that night, she keeps thinking back to the voodoo ceremony, to the snake box and the hair ribbon, and she’s so angry with Gisselle that she finds herself wishing that something really would happen to her sister.

Thoughts that she regrets a couple of days later.

CLIFFHANGER.

Okay! Coming up: more voodoo, cautionary tales, field trips gone awry, and more bratty Gisselle. I’m so glad to be back!

Also: To the wonderful wonderful folks who nominated me for blog awards, I’m working on returning the favor, I just wanted to have a recap up before I did it.

Wow, that is an attractive frozen screen.

I figure that

1. It’s been ages since a recap, so I might as well do a refresher.

2. These characters (most of ‘em) will be with us through the series, so let’s get comfortable with them.

3. I like looking up pictures from True Blood.

Let’s see who we’re dealing with so far, shall we?

Ah am yer put-upon heroine!

This here is Ruby Landry Dumas, the star of our series (at least the first three books). After her mother died having her, Ruby was raised as a poor CAJUN girl in the SWAMPS by her faith-healin’ Grandmere Catherine and marginally by her hard-drinkin’ Grandpere Jack. So far in our story, Ruby has discovered that her friend and almost boyfriend Paul Tate is actually her half-brother, that her father is a rich CREOLE guy from New Orleans, and that she has a twin sister named Gisselle. After her Grandmere’s death and her Grandpere’s subsequent attempts to sell her off, Ruby ran away to the Big Easy, where she has proceeded to be the bestest at everything, win her father’s heart by existing, piss off her stepmother, and royally annoy her twin sister. She’s also made out with her sister’s boyfriend. Ruby is annoying naive, but we’re supposed to find it endearing, so let’s all work on that.

Again with the winsome.

This wonderful creature is Gisselle Dumas, Ruby’s long-lost twin sister. Gisselle was purchased from their mother (basically) immediately after being born, so she was raised in New Orleans by their father and stepmother (though Gisselle doesn’t know that). Gisselle knows what she wants and she wants it now. Gisselle’s hobbies include sunbathing, smoking up, drinking too much, making out with various guys, shopping, and hanging out with her boyfriend Beau. Lately, she has spent most of her time figuring out new ways to bother the new sister who has suddenly inserted herself into Gisselle’s life, taking time and attention (and Beau!) away from Gisselle. She is pretty amazing.

I have no idea what's going on.

This is Paul Tate. He is the first illegitimate child of Gabrielle Landry’s who was sold off. (Sorry Gabby) He was raised by his father and stepmother like Gisselle, and until recently he didn’t know the truth. He is head over heels for Ruby, a fact which didn’t change even after he learned that they were half-brother and half-sister. Paul still wants to get with Ruby, figuring that his money should be able to cover up the truth. As of right now, he is still out in the SWAMPS, and doesn’t yet know that he has another sister. He will probably be really happy about that.

Yeah, that's right. It's me.

This fine fellow is Beau Andreas, Gisselle’s richy CREOLE boyfriend, who has developed quite the thing for Ruby since she’s come to town. We don’t know a whole lot about Beau right now, other than he’s a pretty boy and he may or may not be deeper than he seems. Maybe. Basically he’s a hot blond follower.

Hellooo ladies

 

This is Martin. Martin is one of Beau’s close friends. He’s had the hots for Gisselle for a while and thought that the arrival of Ruby meant that he got a Dumas girlfriend too. That didn’t pan out, but he may yet have luck with Gisselle, since she lacks most qualms.

I cannot deal with any of this right now.

Gisselle was raised by Daphne Dumas, who she believes to be her biological mother. Daphne’s husband Pierre cheated on her with Gabrielle Landry and as Daphne was unable to have any children of her own, she agreed to raise Pierre and Gabrielle’s baby. Daphne is a classic socialite, she lives for dinner parties and spending her husband’s money. She disliked Ruby almost immediately and wants Pierre to be less attached to her. She’s a cold hard bitch.

Sadly, for the life of me I cannot find a suitable picture for Pierre Dumas. He’s just so…sad. See, Pierre was raised in the shadow of his younger brother Jean, and after Jean’s injury in a boating accident, Pierre married a woman he wasn’t that into, and tried to fill his brother’s shoes. Then his mom died because she was so upset about his brother, then Pierre had an affair with a woman that he actually loved, but caved under familial pressure when he knocked her up and then he bought their baby from her. Now he makes a lot of money that he spends on his wife and daughter(s) and cries in his brother’s room at night.

Yeah. Any suggestions?

Man, this picture is weird.

And here, in all her splendor, we have Gabrielle Landry (hey, why not?), oft-described SWAMP maiden/SWAMP fairy/pure soul/earth angel/baby mama, who died giving birth to Ruby and Gisselle. We’ll meet Gabrielle more later on, but for now she is simply a figure, a magical, magical figure. Also, Swamp Thing, official mascot of the Landry series.

Recaps to begin again shortly. I will not set a date because then I will get mad at myself. I <3 you all.

I’ve been getting ready to move, guys, and that’s seriously impeded my recapping time. I will be back ASAP, once I’ve unloaded 300000 boxes of books and craft supplies.

It’s October? October?? Where are the months going? Am I…am I in a VCA novel? Oh man.

With the Mardi Gras holiday over, it’s time for Ruby to start going to school in New Orleans. Gisselle picks out her clothes, but tells her sister that she won’t be able to save her a seat near her in their classes since Gisselle is always surrounded by admiring boys, and she can’t take their thrills away. For her first day, Ruby is going in with Daphne and Pierre so that they can register her, Gisselle (as per usual) is riding with Beau. On the ride over, Daphne tells Ruby to make sure that she only makes friends with the best people—everyone will know Ruby’s story by now, and lots of people will want to get close to her, but she has to make sure about them first. Ruby is a little nervous about this, but Daphne tells her just to check with Gisselle before she makes friends with anyone.

They meet with the principal, who is described in way to much detail for a throw-away character, but we’re told that he has a thyroid condition because that was important for us all to know. Ruby is duly registered and introduced to Caroline Higgins, requisite nerd, who will be Ruby’s guide around the school. Caroline tells Ruby to call her “Mookie”, which is apparently a nickname that she doesn’t like, but that everyone else calls her, so she’s learned to live with it.

Totally Mookie.

Mookie also tells Ruby that everyone has been eagerly awaiting Ruby’s arrival, and no one has been able to concentrate in class all morning. Somehow I don’t think that’s all Ruby’s fault. They go to English class, where, sure ’nuff, all of the seats around Gisselle are full of boys, like she’s Scarlett at the barbecue. The teacher gives Ruby her textbooks, and mentions that the class has been discussing Poe’s “Murders in the Rue Morgue”, and he’s pleasantly surprised when Ruby tells him that she’s already read it. Teacher makes a point of noting that people from the BAYOU aren’t as backwards as some of the students seemed to think, and also that he was afraid he wouldn’t be able to tell Ruby and Gisselle apart, but now he sees that it won’t be a problem. Snap! Gisselle does not like that.

At lunch Beau finds Ruby in the cafeteria and takes her over to the table where Gisselle is holding court along with her two best friends Claudine and Antoinette. Gisselle has been telling everyone about how Ruby used to clean fish and sell napkins by the side of the road, but Beau defends Ruby by telling their friends about her artwork and the paintings that she’s sold. Soon everyone is asking Ruby questions about the BAYOU, and Gisselle, hurting for attention, tries to get some company for a cigarette outside before lunch is over. No one wants to go, including Beau, and Gisselle gets pissed and huffs out with two boys from another table. That afternoon Beau offers Ruby a ride home, and though they wait a little while for Gisselle, she doesn’t show up. Beau, knowing that Gisselle is only making him wait to annoy him, takes off without her, even after Ruby says that she thinks she sees her sister coming out of the school doors.

Weeks go by and school is pretty much school, only Ruby is naturally the best thing that’s ever happened to a school, and she, in short order, becomes the art editor and editorial cartoonist for the school paper, joins the glee club, and gets the lead in the school play.

Don't walk in front of this girl on the stairs, Ruby.

Beau is the other lead in the play, which thrills Ruby and annoys Gisselle, especially when he suggests that she should be Ruby’s understudy since no one would ever know the difference. Gisselle snaps back that he never could tell the real thing from the fake and was that just an orgasm joke in a V.C. Andrews novel? My stars! Gisselle continues that Ruby’s already been her understudy ever since she came to town, since Gisselle had to teach her how to walk and talk and take a bath. Ruby’s all “Gisselle, that’s not truuuue!” and *weeps*, but Gisselle is taking no prisoners and notes that she also had to teach her sister that it wasn’t “natural” for a boy to put his hands under her clothes. BURN.

Ruby screams that that’s a lie and runs out of the cafeteria (and straight out of the school!) crying. She walks home, stopping at one point to watch two little girls playing  in their front yard, and she imagines what life would have been like if she and Gisselle had been raised together. That evening, Gisselle unlocks the adjoining door between their rooms and apologizes to Ruby. She admits that she really was jealous about Beau liking Ruby, and she assures her twin that she’ll make certain that everyone at school knows that she wasn’t telling the truth. Ruby totally buys it. Gisselle then invites Ruby to a slumber party the next night at Claudine’s house. Ruby accepts and the pair happily does their homework together.

The next day at school everyone is nice to Ruby when they see that she and Gisselle have made peace, and Ruby tells Beau about the slumber party. He’s suspicious, as the boys usually hear all about such plans (Maybe you’re just not invited, Beau, ever think of that?), but Ruby figures it was spur of the moment and thinks nothing of it. That night at dinner, Daphne is also annoyed at the short notice, but Pierre thinks that the girls should be allowed to go, and Daphne begrudgingly agrees. At the party are Claudine, Antoinette, and two other girls: Theresa (which is my cat’s name, tee hee), and Deborah. The night starts out innocently enough, eating popcorn and listening to records, and while there is some vodka cranberry action going on, Gisselle doesn’t mix the drinks too strongly and it all seems fine. Ruby brings the party down for a minute when Deborah makes some remark about New Orleans and the BAYOU not being too far apart yet seeming very different, and Ruby’s all “We all want the same things…like love and happiness”. Oh shut up. Gisselle agrees with me and announces that it’s time to have some fun: they’re going to dress up in Claudine’s grandmother’s old clothes and pretend that it’s the ’20s. Claudine parcels out the clothes and Ruby gets an old-timey bathing suit. She changes in Claudine’s room, but leaves her underwear on under the suit since it’s too big for her. Claudine pokes her head in to check on her and immediately tells Ruby can’t leave her underwear on since that’s not historically accurate or whatever. She leaves again and Ruby shrugs and takes the bathing suit back off, then starts to take off her underwear. She has her bra off and is starting on her underpants when she hears laughter. She freezes and then three boys from school (Billy, Edward, and Charles) come leaping out of Claudine’s closet and take some pictures of her. Ruby screams and grabs her clothes and runs into the hallway where her sister and the other girls are waiting all grins. Ruby screams at them and runs into another room to get dressed.

She comes downstairs later and finds everyone sprawled around drinking and she confronts Gisselle, who does not give a damn.

Notice my lack of giving a damn, swamp sister.

She does, however, want to know if Ruby’s going to tell on her, and Ruby says no, since what would be the point? Ruby goes home, determined that the first thing she does will be to lock the adjoining door between their bedrooms once again.

Up next: Sexy art times and ever more frackin’ voodoo.

http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/herocomplex/2009/09/dick-durock-swamp-thing-actor-dies-at-72.html

I had an entirely weird (but for me not so very), crush on you as a kidlet. I loved the TV show. Thank you for your service, and for being Swamp Thing.

Ruby and Gisselle head down to the pool and Gisselle mixes up some incredibly strong rum and cokes. Ruby, of course, gives her a lesson in the dangers of alcohol, detailing Grandpere Jack’s life, but Gisselle is unimpressed and tells her sister to shut it and drink. Ruby chokes some down and immediately feels weird. Lightweight. Gisselle laughs at her and quips the old “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy” and Ruby is confused about who Jack is. Oh Ruby. Gisselle makes fun of her some more and then the boys arrive. Beau’s friend Martin is your average preppy rich guy, swagger and all. Gisselle (as Ruby) immediately starts giggling and making eyes at him, and Ruby (as Gisselle) introduces them. Martin is just amazed at how identical they are, and mentions that he was always jealous of Beau for having such a hot girlfriend, but hey! now there’s another Gisselle!

I can't help but notice that there are two of you.

Gisselle CAJUNS that she ain’t nowhere near as pretty as Ruby, and Ruby, pissed and slightly tipsy, insists that no, her sister is prettier! Beau is clearly onto their switcheroo, but he doesn’t say anything. Gisselle prattles on about her supposed past in the bayou, all about the scandalous things that were done to her, and that she did, and she basically promises Martin that she’ll sleep with him for jewelry. Ruby is getting angrier and angrier as her sister besmirches her name, but Gisselle takes Martin off into the shadows and Ruby is left alone with Beau. Beau starts kissing her, and she pulls back and tells him the truth. He plays dumb, but Ruby calls him on it, and he admits that he knew. They see Martin and Gisselle making out and Beau gets pissed and decides that revenge is in order. He pulls Ruby into the cabana and they make out some more. Gisselle interrupts and ends the ruse, confusing poor Martin all the more. Everyone drinks some more, then Gisselle takes Beau into the cabana and Ruby sits with Martin, who tries to make a move on her, but passes out. Ruby sits alone for a few minutes before Beau and a sick Gisselle come out of the cabana. Beau foists Gisselle off on Ruby, then collects Martin and skedaddles, but not without first whispering to Ruby that hers is the kiss he’ll remember. Oh Beau, you tart. Ruby takes Gisselle and the bottle of rum upstairs, and on the way she hears somebody crying in one of the other bedrooms. Gisselle tells her to ignore it, and Ruby gets her sister to her room. Gisselle collapses on her bed and orders Ruby out, but first tells her to hide the rum in her (Ruby’s) closet. Ruby leaves and does so. She hears Daphne coming upstairs and peeks out the door in time to see Daphne pause and listen to the crying, then go into her bedroom. Ruby goes out to investigate, but before she can enter the room where the crying is, Pierre interrupts her. He says she must have been imagining things, as that room was his brother Jean’s and no one’s used it for years. Ruby gives up and goes to bed.

Oh hooray, more voodoo. Ruby gets up in the morning and goes down to breakfast, going to the kitchen afterward to tell Nina how much she liked it. Nina has decided that Ruby is not a spirit, which is good, because otherwise she’d have to do an incredibly gross and elaborate ritual involving black cat guts and graveyards. Ruby mentions the crying she’d heard the night before, and once Nina hears that she drags Ruby back to her room in the servants’ quarters. It’s covered in hanging herbs and candles and jars of weird powders and a picture of Marie Laveau. Nina does something with a white candle and some brimstone to Ruby, since someone has obviously put a curse on the poor girl. Yeah, and his name is Andrew Neiderman.

(JK, Mr. Neiderman, I love you. Pin…is one of my favorite movies ever, and Devil’s Advocate is also pretty okay, and you wrote those books, so you’re clearly talented. But come on with the voodoo already.)

Ruby goes back to the dining room, where she meets Daphne, who sends her up to get Gisselle. Ruby tries, but her sister is the worse for wear, and Ruby is forced to tell Daphne that Gisselle is sick. Daphne goes up to see for herself, and discovers that Gisselle is hungover. Gisselle then blames everything on Ruby and tells Daphne where Ruby hid the rum. Daphne freaks out at Ruby for a bit, then storms off. Ruby is pissed at Gisselle, but her sister explains that she’d already gotten in trouble for drinking recently, so she couldn’t risk getting in trouble again. She’ll smooth things over with Pierre, so Ruby needs to chill. Ruby tells Gisselle about the crying, and Gisselle tells her that it was Pierre. He often goes into his brother’s old room and cries. Ruby says something about Uncle Jean’s death, but Gisselle corrects her—Jean isn’t dead, he’s just pretty much a vegetable, and he lives in a mental institute where Pierre and Gisselle go to see him once a year on his birthday. Gisselle is also sure to note that Uncle Jean is still pretty hot, vegetable or no. Gisselle. Inappropriate. Tell her about Paul, Ruby, she’ll probably get the first bus to the bayou. Girls, I’m going to risk using Old Meme in order to give you two some words of wisdom:

Learn it. Know it. Live it.

Later on, Pierre and Daphne call the girls in to scold them. Gisselle turns on the waterworks, naturally. Interestingly, Pierre is against unsupervised drinking because they could all get into a car accident (FORESHADOWING), while Daphne is against it because shenanigans could occur. Though Daphne clearly wants Ruby to get in big trouble, the twins get off with a warning and Ruby has her first art lesson. Her teacher is a wacky artsy type and naturally she is the most talented thing to ever do anything ever, and it’s all the more amazing because she came from the SWAMPS. There’s a weird “If she would be my student she must accept everything I say without question” moment that seems like it should turn into something later on, but it never does.

He was pretty creepy.

You’re the one sulking around in the shadows, Swamp Thing, jeez. You’re just getting pathetic at this point.

Professor Art leaves, and Ruby and Gisselle go out with Beau and Martin. They head to the French Quarter, where they score some weed and take Ruby to an adult toy shop just to shock her. It’s not difficult. In that same vein, Gisselle decides that they’re taking Ruby to Storyville. As they’re walking around, they stop in front of a big house with loud jazz music coming out of it. As they watch, an older man gets escorted to his car by a young lady wearing a super low-cut dress. It’s Annie, the girl Ruby met on the bus. We’re kindly reminded that Annie is a quadroon. (The points from Pin…are wearing off, guy) She tells Ruby that her aunt got her the job and she’s only working there until she gets an audition. She’s glad that Ruby found her family, and she promises to send Ruby the information when she has her first singing gig. Everyone is amazed that Ruby knows a prostitute, and Gisselle is disbelieving when Ruby insists that she didn’t know. The group goes back to the twins’ house to smoke, and Ruby (of course) has some wacky Reefer Madness reaction. Beau takes her to her room to lie down. Ruby falls asleep and gets woken up by Gisselle several hours later when it’s time for dinner. Gisselle warns her not to say anything. Before they go downstairs, Gisselle mentions that Beau was pretty upset about Ruby getting sick, and that he really seems to like her. Gisselle might be getting bored with Beau anyway, so she tells Ruby that she might let her have him. Ruby wonders if she wants him as the twins go down to dinner.

Whew! Sorry about the delay, folks, it’s been that kind of time around here lately! I know this was a short one, but we’re almost through and I’ll get them out faster if they’re shorter. Coming up: High school in the BIG CITY! Slumber party pranks! Scandalous art moments!